There are only a few things that hurt more than a breakup with your boyfriend. It’s hard living without being in touch with your partner, best friend, and romantic interest.
But what if you could get him back? You may entertain this thought but then brush it off immediately because you think it’s impossible.
Here are tips on how to get your ex-boyfriend back.
Give It Time
After a breakup, things can get really messy on both ends. There is a lot of hurt and bitterness. Introducing the idea of getting back together immediately after a breakup may end up worsening the situation.
Allowing your partner to have their personal space and calm down may be a good start in making things work. There’s no specific length of time that you should wait before you break the silence. The best time is when you feel you’ve gotten some clarity in the relationship.
For example, if you’re the one who broke off the relationship, only break the silence if you genuinely miss your ex and not because you feel guilty or bored. If your partner broke up with you, you’ve probably been analyzing where you went wrong and blaming yourself. Only reach out after completely getting a handle on the negative feelings.
Avoid Bad-Mouthing Your Ex-Boyfriend
Breakups can feel horrible and it’s only natural that you’ll need to vent to your BFFs. Yet, you can vent without being vindictive, especially if you’re hoping to get back together with your ex.
Put yourself in his shoes. You wouldn’t appreciate someone you love spreading fake rumors, spilling your secrets and sending you tons of angry messages.
Also, not bad-mouthing the other party is a general rule for all breakups regardless of future relations. You won’t feel better after all the gossiping.
Get a Life for Yourself
It can get pretty lonely after the breakup. You have to figure out what to do with that rainy Tuesday or your movie date night. But learning how to love and appreciate yourself when you’re lonely is the most crucial part of the process.
Invest in new hobbies and friendships and enjoy your life as much as you can even if you’re still struggling with the sadness. It’s only when you’ve faced the fear of being alone that you can decide if you want to get back with your ex.
If the only time you miss your ex is when you compare yourself with your friends in relationships and when you’re feeling lonely, then getting back together might not be best for you. Only use ways on how to get back with your ex-boyfriend if you miss him when you’re happy and confident, too.
You can also take an ex back quiz to know if you truly want to get back with your ex-boyfriend.
Don’t Overthink What to Tell Them
You’ve evaluated the cause of your breakup and decided you want to get with your ex and you’re sure they’re not dating. It’s time to start the conversation. It will obviously feel strange and a bit awkward.
The only thing you need to remember at this point is doing what is right for the relationship. For long-term relationships, you can be straightforward with your partner and tell them you miss them. But for short-term relationships, keep it simple and ask them if they’d want to hang out.
Read the other person during the interaction to see how they might be feeling about you approaching them. Be thoughtful, gentle, and intentional with your words, but try not to overthink it.
Put Your Best Self Forward
No matter who broke up with who, you’ll want to look and feel your best when you’re getting around to rekindling a flame. When it’s time to meet up or send pics to your ex, make sure you look your best.
Show them how emotionally stable you are and make them want you back. Put your best self forward instead of crawling back to them.
Choose a Comfortable Meeting Spot
You probably want to take your ex to that bar with dimly-lit candles and velvet booths where you went on your first date. This is no doubt, very romantic. But one crucial thing to keep in mind is that you don’t want to pressure them.
Taking them to spots that meant something to both of you could make them feel uncomfortable if you’re initially posing the idea of getting back together. Again, read their energy and see which location would be best.
It might be best to just meet for coffee or a walk in the afternoon so there are no high expectations of the meet-up. This will allow you two to open up and have relaxed conversations about how you actually feel.
Deal With the Elephants in the Room First
You may be tempted to begin flirting with your ex-boyfriend to warm them up. This may not work as they may feel like it’s only a moment you’re having.
It’s vital that you start by sorting out the big issues. For example, apologize to your partner if you know there are things they expect you to be sorry for. This shows that you’re serious about getting together and you’ve given it some thought.
Remember to be considerate and honor their feelings and recollection of how things went. Be solution-based so conversations don’t turn into empty arguments.
How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back After a Breakup
There is nothing worse than losing the person you consider a soulmate or just a great match. It can be devastating and very frustrating.
However, this doesn’t have to be the end. Using the above tips can help you get your ex-boyfriend back after a breakup. Before you decide to implement the steps, be sure that it’s the right thing for both you and your partner.